Read If I Understood You Would I Have This Look on My Face? My Adventures in the Art and Science of Relating and Communicating Alan Alda 9780812989144 Books
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NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER • Award-winning actor Alan Alda tells the fascinating story of his quest to learn how to communicate better, and to teach others to do the same. With his trademark humor and candor, he explores how to develop empathy as the key factor.
“Invaluable.”—Deborah Tannen, #1 New York Times bestselling author of You’re the Only One I Can Tell and You Just Don’t Understand
Alan Alda has been on a decades-long journey to discover new ways to help people communicate and relate to one another more effectively. If I Understood You, Would I Have This Look on My Face? is the warm, witty, and informative chronicle of how Alda found inspiration in everything from cutting-edge science to classic acting methods. His search began when he was host of PBS’s Scientific American Frontiers, where he interviewed thousands of scientists and developed a knack for helping them communicate complex ideas in ways a wide audience could understand—and Alda wondered if those techniques held a clue to better communication for the rest of us.
In his wry and wise voice, Alda reflects on moments of miscommunication in his own life, when an absence of understanding resulted in problems both big and small. He guides us through his discoveries, showing how communication can be improved through learning to relate to the other person listening with our eyes, looking for clues in another’s face, using the power of a compelling story, avoiding jargon, and reading another person so well that you become “in sync” with them, and know what they are thinking and feeling—especially when you’re talking about the hard stuff.
Drawing on improvisation training, theater, and storytelling techniques from a life of acting, and with insights from recent scientific studies, Alda describes ways we can build empathy, nurture our innate mind-reading abilities, and improve the way we relate and talk with others. Exploring empathy-boosting games and exercises, If I Understood You is a funny, thought-provoking guide that can be used by all of us, in every aspect of our lives—with our friends, lovers, and families, with our doctors, in business settings, and beyond.
“Alda uses his trademark humor and a well-honed ability to get to the point, to help us all learn how to leverage the better communicator inside each of us.”—Forbes
“Alda, with his laudable curiosity, has learned something you and I can use right now.”—Charlie Rose
Read If I Understood You Would I Have This Look on My Face? My Adventures in the Art and Science of Relating and Communicating Alan Alda 9780812989144 Books
"I really enjoy every book that Mr. Alda has written, including this one. I found it very profound, and thought-provoking. I think it resonated with me more because I am also working on my MBA and my current class is communications. I was especially drawn in with the topics of empathy and dark empathy, but the one quote that has stayed with me is "if we're actually able to get inside someone's head, it's not a good idea of being guilty of breaking and entering." Mr. Alda shares his experience and knowledge and his own journey of relating and communicating. I am truly interested in learning about his experiences, and I'm glad he shares them."
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If I Understood You Would I Have This Look on My Face? My Adventures in the Art and Science of Relating and Communicating Alan Alda 9780812989144 Books Reviews :
If I Understood You Would I Have This Look on My Face? My Adventures in the Art and Science of Relating and Communicating Alan Alda 9780812989144 Books Reviews
- Normally, I find this kind of book that has one big idea, an ideal candidate for skimming. There is often a lot of filler, and a tendency to pound away at that one idea until the book has reached an acceptable length for commercial publication. Alan Alda's book has the one idea, that we have to relate to each other in order to communicate, and then he embroiders on that theme for the rest of the book, but it is so entertaining and chatty, that I enjoyed it well after buying into the big idea. He uses examples from sociology and psychology studies as well as from his experiences as an actor. Nicely done!
- 5++ stars
Every single person on the planet should read this book. Alan Alda (who is a phenomenal writer) has written a highly informative book about the importance of communicating better. He then goes on to provide innovative and creative ways to help people do so. He is a natural storyteller, and the book is so entertaining that I completed it in one evening. Alda uses miscommunication stories from his own life to demonstrate how important it is for people to understand each other, and the issues that arise when we don’t. A major focus of Alda’s is teaching empathy. Relating to others creates empathy, and from there the desire to understand and cooperate is born. He also focuses on improving communication through listening with our eyes, using a story to make a point, eliminating confusing jargon, and paying close attention to what the other’s person’s face is telling us.
If I Understood You is one of the most informative and useful books that I have read in a long while. After I finished it, I immediately emailed my daughter’s teachers suggesting they use it to support a creative combined math and science class that she took last year. I also think the techniques will help me with my own relationships, including my husband, children and friends. I highly, highly recommend this book to everyone. This book would make a great gift, and our world (and particularly our country right now) would be such a better place if everyone followed his ideas. Thanks to NetGalley and Random House for the chance to read this ARC in exchange for an honest review. - Who knew that Alan Alda has been involved with teaching scientists and doctors to communicate with the rest of us since - well, at least since 2009, when he founded the Alda-Kavli Center for Communicating Science at Stony Brook?
Not me. And I'm delighted that he has, and even more delighted that he wrote a book about his efforts.
As a teacher, coach, and consultant on topics of communication, conflict transformation, and empathy, I *really* appreciate Alda's insights as well as his tips and techniques, many of them learned through his days as an actor and in working with improvisation. I've happily adopted some of his ideas into my own work (with attribution, of course), and plan to explore the ideas of improv in the near future.
This is a fun AND informative look at what it means for all of us to communicate better - not just scientists or medical folk - and includes suprisingly easy and remarkably powerful experiments and practices that are helpful for anyone seeking to be a better, more empathetic communicator. Which, in this era of so much upheaval, really ought to be all of us. - I really enjoy every book that Mr. Alda has written, including this one. I found it very profound, and thought-provoking. I think it resonated with me more because I am also working on my MBA and my current class is communications. I was especially drawn in with the topics of empathy and dark empathy, but the one quote that has stayed with me is "if we're actually able to get inside someone's head, it's not a good idea of being guilty of breaking and entering." Mr. Alda shares his experience and knowledge and his own journey of relating and communicating. I am truly interested in learning about his experiences, and I'm glad he shares them.
- I attended a play with Mr. Alda some years ago when he played Richard Feynman. He was magnificent conveying a lot of the spirit of the real man. Alan Alda is no scientist and he will assure you of that fact. But, he has the ability to communicate as he demonstrated for over a decade presenting science innovations. This book attempts to talk about what it is to communicate ideas in the terms that Mr. Alda understands. That is, through improvisational acting tools. Some critics of this book dislike that approach to communication. The tools are not as meaningful to non-actors.
Thus there are some negative reviews. I am more positive about the principles presented by Mr. Alda. He understands the problems with crossing disciplines and has some useful guidance for people. - It was "eh". There were parts I loved, but a TON of repetition and quite a bit of rambling about personal feelings. I was determined to make it to the end (and I did), but I was on (audible) 2+ by the end of the book because I was getting bored. It's not that long a book... It's not a book I would ever read again, I did regret buying it instead of checking it out from the library.
If you like Alan Alda, it will probably be a fun read for you. The one good thing I got out of it was the use of improv to improve communication and reception skills so it's not 100% without merit. - This is a great book, an easy read, funny and quite informative.
One has to understand though - this is NOT a strict GUIDE about how to get better at communicating.
This is exactly what is said on the cover Alan Alda's ADVENTURES (read - "experience") in the field of good communication.
The book touches upon many topics that explain good communication and ways one can achieve it, the studies that were done, the insights professionals have. Again, this isn't a definitive guide, but it gives very good food for thought!
I've read it once through and want to go back the second time to read and this time - take notes.
